Haebin

When I found out two weeks ago that Neil —and Tim too— were coming to Utrecht and that this would be my chance to finally see him, I was quite surprised at how quickly I took charge of the situation. First, I looked for a flight, but quickly realized that Utrecht doesn't have an airport and that it would be impossible for me to get to Utrecht from Amsterdam by train or bus. That was the first moment when I thought, hm, this isn't going to work. And then my mother asked how far away it actually was. So I looked it up and found out that it's almost 400 kilometers and takes about four hours to drive there. She then suggested that she would drive me there. I was so surprised that at first I didn't know how to react, but she was completely serious. The next step was to ask Jutta if she was free that weekend. We talked on the phone and she told me she couldn't make it because she was taking a carpentry course on Saturday. That was the second moment when I thought, well, this isn't going to work either. Right?

And then I had the idea to ask if she could perhaps look after Ivi on Sunday so I could go to the Convention, and yes, she could. She even suggested that she would come to my place on Saturday afternoon after her carpentry class and then look after Ivi for half the day, all of Sunday, and Monday morning!
And that was my cue to put my plan into action. So, I bought tickets for the convention (for my mom and me, because I didn't want to use her as a taxi driver and I know how much fun she had at Magic Con), the ticket for Neil's photo booth, and accommodation at the Ibis Hotel, less than a kilometer from Jaarbeus, where the convention was held. And then I counted down the minutes, and when the last week began, I really had to fight hard against my nervousness.
Even in therapy, the trip to Utrecht was a topic of discussion, and Franziska managed to calm me down somewhat.

On the evening when I made all the decisions and placed the first bookings, I was chatting with Sarah. She was incredibly happy that I finally had the chance to meet Neil, but at the same time a little sad because her trip to the convention in Brussel had been rather stressful.
We were both sure that we would find a convention somewhere next year that we could both go to. I then suggested that she come with me and that we meet in Utrecht on Sunday and all go to the convention together. Sarah was unsure because she was afraid of having such a stressful time again, even though she told me that she didn't really think that would happen if we were traveling together. I understood her concerns, and we immediately set our rules, such as that it's okay to split up if she needs some quiet time or just wants to go shopping. That we always have the option to pause and say, “Wait a minute, I need some time to myself right now” or “I'm feeling stressed.” In those moments, we would do what was good for us and meet up at the meeting point. We really planned everything. From our time together, our meeting place, the time, the fact that we would meet at the hotel in the morning so she could store her backpack in my room, etc.

Sarah had booked a bus ticket from Strasbourg to Utrecht for a ten-hour journey from Saturday evening to Sunday morning.
Since Mom and I didn't want to stress ourselves out, I had booked a hotel room for Saturday to Monday. Our plan was to leave around 10 a.m. on Saturday morning, as we wanted to check in around 3 p.m.
We didn't want to stress ourselves out and wanted to take the 400-kilometer journey in a relaxed manner. I was quite calm and relaxed after therapy on Thursday, but then I noticed that I was getting slight stomach pains from excitement.

On Thursday evening, I received a message from the Ibis Hotel...

„Dear guest,
 
We are excited that you booked a stay with us at ibis Utrecht!
 
With this email, we would like to inform you about some specifics regarding our hotel during your stay. Due to unforeseen additional work following our renovations, you may experience some noise disturbance on weekdays between 9 AM and 4 PM, and we currently have fewer parking spaces available. Additionally, our elevator is temporarily out of order. All hotel rooms remain easily accessible via the stairs... „

One day and a few hours before we drive to Utrecht to check in. Hey, I have no problem with renovations, and the noise didn't bother me either, since we were there on the weekend, but... the elevator isn't working? And the rooms are “easy” to reach in a hotel that has four or five floors? Honestly, I was pissed.
The hotel has apparently been renovating for quite some time, and I assume they could have informed me when I made the booking... but they didn't.
I was too stressed to look for another hotel so close to my trip to Utrecht. IN ADDITION, as I said, I wouldn't have gotten a refund if I had canceled the stay. If you pay via PayPal, that's not possible... I mean, it's paid for, so why isn't that option offered?

Well, I sat there and thought to myself, OK, this isn't my problem, guys. I'm a guest, you have to take care of it. So I wrote an email and asked for a disabled-accessible room (as described on the website) that was either on the ground floor OR on the first floor at most. I have limited mobility, I have obvious muscle and nerve weakness, and I definitely don't have the strength to carry my 10 kg walker up or down stairs. And I certainly won't ask my 73-year-old mother to do so.
Incidentally, I then received a reply saying that the accessible room (with an accessible bathroom!) was “out of order”...
However, I was then offered another “accessible” room, whose door is not wheelchair accessible. But I could get in with my walker. When I got there, the shower had no seat and the toilet had no handle that I could hold on to or pull myself up with.
Sigh...

I had been assured in the email that they would help me with my luggage and walker and bring them to my booked room. I told my mother about this, and she wasn't really happy about it because she knew that it would be very difficult for both of us to use the stairs and, as I said, carry our things upstairs. But I was very aware that I was asserting my rights as a guest. I wouldn't have done that years ago. I would have nodded and struggled my way up with the walker and the luggage. But I am disabled and I need help, and I now demand it.

We spent Friday evening packing my suitcase and her bag. I think we took mostly food and drinks with us, since we wanted to stay in the room anyway. I was nervous, but at the same time excited, even though it felt so unreal that there was a real chance I could meet Neil.

I had been nervous all week about whether he would actually show up in Utrecht, since he had to cancel the convention in Liverpool last week. He streamed in the evening last week and said at the end that he would be going to Holland over the weekend. \o/
One less thing to worry about.
I went to bed around midnight and was surprised that I fell asleep relatively quickly...

( Little Helper! )

Much Love,
Anke~

Knowing that neither Janika nor Jutta would be coming to the Comic Convention in Stuttgart was a real downer.
Especially because Janika had such a long journey (from Berlin) and had to pay most of the costs. But I know that she made the right decision not to take the flight and the whole trip with an unhealed pneumonia and a low oxygen level.
I spoke to her briefly today and she is still ill. Jutta is now so well again that she has decided to go back to work. Unfortunately, she still has that annoying cough.

I spoke to Carina on Friday evening and she assured me that she and her husband Dennis, including their son Robin, would be coming to Stuttgart. They were also joined by a young woman from Munich who wrote to Carina on Vagabonds (Neil's Discord) and asked if she could join them because she was struggling with anxiety in large crowds. That wasn't a problem for me at all and Freya got in touch with me and we spent the evening chatting.

I packed my suitcase on Friday afternoon and was so anxious and nervous afterwards that I decided to take my emergency medication. It definitely helped me to calm down and think clearly again. By 10 o'clock in the evening I was so tired that I actually went to bed and fell asleep straight away. I was awake by six o'clock in the morning. My flight left at 12.40PM so I had enough time to take a warm bath, get dressed and then wait. And to my own surprise, I wasn't nervous at all. O_o
Maybe because I planned everything over and over again or tried to calm my mother who was a lot more nervous than me. So we set off at 9 in the morning, but first had to clear the ice from our car as it had been incredibly cold during the night. The drive to the airport took between 20 and 25 minutes and we drove to the airport parking garage. The way to Terminal 1 was still not close, lol. It's unbelievable how big Frankfurt Airport is.
What I really liked was the fact that everything was already decorated for Christmas. *_*

( Pictures and more behind the cut )

today i told u that i am very lazy and sleepy, ne? so i thought, i would only going to the lavender food square today, meeting alecs, having lunch, saying goodbye and going back to the hostel for sleep...
MEEP! WRONG!
When I am together with alecs i never know what happens. thinking about eating here? no way. we have to go like 30 minutes far away (is ja nicht so, als wuerden wir zwischenzeitlich an 100 foodshops vorbeilaufen, rofl). so, when I was close to a breakdown because of the heat, he finally found a shop which was good enough, lol.
and trust me, I tried some strange things. at first I've eat some noodles with meat, that was very tasty. I had some soup with vegetables, some fish eggs *and no, no caviar ... it was actually some fish meat pressed into a ball*, fish *it was extremely gelly but kay* and some meat balls. The last taste pretty nice.
Alecs ate some pig intestines and said always I should try it. But no way. Doen't matter what I feel for him, but I am NOT eating this.

the funniest thing is, that I can always laugh with alecs. he has an awesome humor and I am laughing so, so often. really cute are our funny conversations. they are awesome. We had one today and when I am thinking about it, I am still giggling.
so, when we went to the fortune teller, I had to lay my hands on a stone. don't ask me for what.
so, we had this conversation:

alecs: so what did u feel when u touched the stone?
me: it was actually pretty cold
alecs: oh yeah ... because it was a stone
me: no, not this way. it was a strange coldness
alecs: yeah, that was because the stone stood next to an air conditioner >_>"
me: -_-
alecs: HELLOOOOOOOOOO?!? I am a stone, of course I am cold xDDD

so, we having the most strange conversations ever. He told me about I should visit a prostitute, just for looking. making pictures and so on o.O
I asked him why he knows about such things *blinkblink* and he answered in this cool way: because I am a guy.

I don't know how often I started to laugh. he is awesome. and cute. supercute! (that's a thing he said about himself :P)

So, we went to the Mustafa Complex and I joined him when he bought something for his shop. Even then we made some jokes, lol.
When he was finished, we made a picture for facebook and I hope I am not looking ugly or too fat, lol.

So, he left me and I went around a little bit. So, I bought something to drink and sat on a bench. After a while I saw a guy sitting there, staring at me o.O
At first I thought, okay, maybe he wants to be nice ... and everytime I looked he smiled. So I was really confused about it. The next time when I took a look in his direction, he sat on the next table o.O
After five minutes he stood next to me o____O
And he started a conversation. Oh wait, let me say it like it really was ... he tried it, but his accent was so hard that I had problems to understand him o.O
I talked about a boyfriend and not having time, went in the next shop to buy some stuff for my hair ... as I noticed that the guy followed me o____O
I was confused and after some minutes I became really annoyed. Then he disappeared and was so happy because I thought, yes, finally he is away ... and then he appeared again in the corridor I stood and asked me: ready for loving?

...

..........

WHAT THE FUCK YOU DUMBASS?
No, I am not ready for making love with an indian stranger. u are so NOT my type of a guy and I am NOT going with the next one in a hotel, having sex -__-
I guess, my reaction of his question was pretty clear so he left the shop. Gosh, I was ... grrrrrrr
Damn those guys. First the two black ones, now the indian one. Hey, I AM in asia. where are the asian ones? LOL.

Anyway, I had a really nice talk with Grace from the hostel now. Nearly 2 hours. She is so cute and she is looking like Lucy Liu :D

I think, I'll go to my room now, changing clothes and going to the swimming complex XD

Like Alecs said ... are u going there for sinking down or swimming? XDDDDD
Lol, I told him that I can't swim, so I am just enjoying the water *____*

See u, Sweethearts XD
**/

or something like that, lol.
actually i am feeling like my whole body is in flames. i was with alecs at his senseis place. and yes, i got a treatment. worst pain ever in my whole life. but alecs told me, that I got the guy who was more gentle than his guy, rofl. so he was more in pain *hihi*

but let us beging from the start. actually i wanted to take the mrt this morning to the central, but i wasn't insecure and so i used the taxi. but alecs said, he want to see me at chinatown mrt. so i used the one from the central to chinatown. like a little test whether i am able to use the mrt without freaking out or not. i did it, yay.
So, I was one hour to early, lol. I walked a little bit around, made pictures and then sat in a corner, reading my book and waited for alecs. sometimes it is such a pain in the ass to meet with him, because he is never waiting there where I am waiting, rofl. We tend to run into circles to find each other :P

So, he brought me through chinatown. pretty impressive. I have to visit it again. and then we visited the beautiful buddha tooth relic temple and museum. omg, such a beautiful place. so impressing and calming. gosh, beautiful, just beautiful. the temple is pretty *young*, but a wonderful place to find your inner strength and peace.
When u want to see how it looks like, click this page:
http://www.btrts.org.sg/
It is so, so impressing. and alecs is such a great tour guide. He is taking care for me, explaining me everything, is constantly buying drinks for me because he is worried I am not drinking enough. But when I am out of breath and need a break he is saying to me: no way, it is exercising. When u are sitting down u need 20 minutes before u wanna walk again. rofl. he is so right.
so sometimes i have the feeling that i am seeing whole singapore in just 2 hours because we are walking like crazy. oh, excuse me, not walking ... running. for alecs it is walking pretty slow, for me it is running and begging for a break, rofl.

so, after that we went back to chinatown and went to his sensei. and I got a treatment. gosh, it hurt. it really hurt. and those things the guy used on my back (some chinese herbage oil) burned like hell. It is not really a massage, it is more from qi gong. like stroking and slapping u. and the slaps were so ... aaaaaah ;_;
I swear, I felt like I would be standing in flames O.O

So, I bought some oil and the sensei said, I have to take care of my back. he felt that my muscles and my bones are in need of a good treatment, because I am having those pains for years. And I don't should carry heavy things. So, I paid for this *including the oil) 31 singapore dollar, what isn't really expensive.

After that we went back to the central and i went with alecs in his store. he showed me one of his creepy hobbies (jutta, erinnerst du dich, was ich dir mal erzaehlt habe?). And really, I got such goose bumps. Suddenly I felt very sad and saw in front of my inner eyes (can not explain it in a better way) and old man sitting. he seemed so sad that his life ended and ... gosh, it was a really creepy experience.
I told him that and alecs was surprised that I felt something. And that I actually saw someone o.O

Then he brought me to his hairdresser. and yes, i have a completely new style. it is shorter now, I have a perm, my color is between darkbrown and red now. when I looked in the mirrow *and trust me, I hate it to look at the mirror* I was like ... wtf, who is that? O.O
I have to say, a paid a lot. okay, compared to germany not really a lot. it was 286 singapore dollar *around 145 euro* for cutting my hair, dyeing and a perm + manicure. And yes, fuck it, I deserve something like that. The last time when I went to the hairstyler was like ... 6 years ago. And I felt so good after it.
So, when I left Chris (she is really such a cutie), I send alecs a message and he left his shop, pretended like he would go to the toilet to his wife, and we met again. he loves it. okay, he said, it's nice, but in english the meaning is nicer than in german, rofl (ihr wisst schon, nett is der kleine bruder von sch*eisse und so, lol).
So, we wanna meet us tomorrow again, because ... nya, tomorrow is our first anniversary. lol. when I asked him that, he said ... tomorrow? hm ... tomorrow? Did I forget something, rofl.
Yeah, great, a year before I've met u, lol.

so, I used the mrt alone (!) to the lavender street, with changing my trains! I DID IT!!! and then an old chinese woman asked me where I come from and said then: U are so pretty!
I guess, I smiled in circles, lol. I was so thankful for the compliment I got and went back to the hostel.
There I've met David, the owner, and I wanted to change my 2 dollars into coins for drink. but he gave me an dollar and said: It's my treat.
WOOOOOOHOOOOOOOO!

AND ... better news. the one guy who watched pr0n here, got a last warning. it is forbidden to watch pr0n here and when he is doing it again, he has to leave hostel. So, it worked. I talked in a normal way to grace, begged for help for this situation and it worked.

I swear, i am glaring of happiness right now, lol.

ah, before I reached a hostel a guy tried to flirt with me. but now the bad side: it wasn't an asian :(
yesterday and today black guys asked me for meeting them. but no, i don't want it. i don't know why, but i am not really into black guys.
i wanna have a date with an asian one ... so *cough*moveurfuckingass*cough* LOL

omg
i have to tell u this. when i had the treatment at alecs sensei he got one, too. and he had to take off his shirt ... mdjkvhcncjfhfgfh o.o! O.O!!!
O___________________O!!!

I saw his tattoos. And his nipple piercings.
OH MY FUCKING GOD. I swear, I grinned like I would be retarted, rofl. When his sensei said, take ur shirt off, he looked at me, smiled totally shy like ... omg, now she is looking on my big fat beer belly, muahahahaha.
And yes, I DID!!! But he is not really fat. he has the right weight. and he is a very attractive and handsome young guy :3

so, that is all from me ... for now XD
lol!

See u, huns :D
Anke

I can not login into facebook and I don't have any idea why. when it works, my whole facebook side looks fucked up =(
That sucks because I wanted to send Kazuki-chan my cellphone number and wanted to see what is going on with my friends.
I think, maybe facebook is having some problems and I hope they will fix it as soon as possible.

So, I really woke up this morning at 6AM with a smile on my face. I came online maybe to catch Jutta, but she slept probably at 11PM? :D
So, I replied on some comments, went back to my single-room and tried to sleep. but I couldn't, maybe because i feel so happy, lol.

I think I will pack my stuff again in my bags to change my room. it is now 8AM, so I don't wanna wake up the other girl. Have to wait a little bit more =)

So, this morning I thought about yesterday and I really want to share something with u what made me giggling the whole time.
I told alecs that I really like it to listen to him when he is speaking chinese. So, we sat at the cab, I looked at him, smiled and said:
Alecs? Could you say something in chinese because I love it listening to u.
Alecs: Ni Hao? o.O
*burst out into laughters*
I know, that sounds so silly, but the way he said it and looked at me, I couldn't stop. He has an awesome humor and he nagged about me the whole time yesterday when we eat something, because I was too slow, lol.
And he has a really bad habit. When I've eaten he told me about the most disgusting dishes I have ever heard of it. Like eating living fishes or eating the eyes of a fish, frog, pork skin and whatever. The whole time I was yelling *eeeeeeeeeeeeew*
I guess, he liked it, lol.
He is awesome. Can't wait to see him again. yesterday night he send me a message again, but my cellphone was in my room, so I got his message this morning. what a lovely way to wake up :)

I'll send him a message later, when he woke up, because I am pretty sure he is still sleeping now.

So, that's all from me. And come on, people, give me comments, I have to answer something when I am coming online, lol.

Lots of Hugs =)

Anke

Mou, I am sick =/
And that is my dads fault. The last days he sneezed and coughed like crazy. Now he is fine and my mum and I are sick =(
And beside of that I have problems with my stomach and feel like throwing up constantly. Not a nice feeling. And at the end I had horrible back pains this night. Beside of that, I am okay. I am still feeling “nyappy” because of the concert. I don’t know why, but An Cafes concerts make me happy :)

This morning I woke up at 5 AM. That is the time when I normally chat with Alecs *laughs*
But he is in Bangkok right now for five days, having holidays and visiting his Thai Tattoo Master. It is strange, but when I browsed this morning through the web, I missed him so much. Okay, I miss him with every minute, but I am happy for him because I know he really needs a break from everything.
The funniest thing was on Friday I said goodbye to him, because I knew that he can’t come online at the weekend … because his wife is using the internet. When I said “bye” to him and noticed, that he can’t come online, he gave me the answer: “I’ll try to come online for you.”
On Saturday I turned on my computer and went back to the bed to sleep. And he didn’t come online. But I was okay with that. On Saturday evening I came online and I had an offline-message of from him. I was so surprised, because he never wrote me before at the afternoon (german time). So, I wrote him a mail, saying that I am sorry for missing him online and so on. And Sunday morning he came online for 10 minutes to say goodbye again *laughs*
And yesterday evening he came back online again O_O
I was like “wtfomfg” *laughs*
I asked why he is online again and he said, he can’t find sleep, so he wanted to talk with me. Isn’t that cute?
He really seems to like me. He likes me so much that he start to chat secretly with me at his home … during his wife is sleeping in the other room. I know, that sounds so … “bitchy”. I never wanted be “the second woman” in a men’s life, but … my heart is going another way than my mind. And … I don’t like her. Not because she is his wife, no … I didn’t like her at the first second, because her behaviour is so arrogant and so narrow minded. And it hurts me to see how Alecs is suffering in this marriage *sigh*
I wish he would kick her out his house because of the things she did to him…
But that is not my decision, ne?...

So, anyway. Did someone watch the Korean movie “Antique”? God, I watched it today and the movie is SO, SO awesome :3
It’s one of my favourite movies now =D
I need the soundtrack AND I have to make icons of the cute guys in the movie. They are all sooo, sooo good looking. I think, Korean guys are the hottest guys in Asia. Damn, look at their bodies XD
So, if you didn’t watch “Antique” until now, do it! I highly recommend it and you won’t regret the movie!!!

So, take care everyone :)
Luv ya all :3
Anke~